The Power of Acceptance

Do you have some things going on in your life right now that are hard for you to accept? If you said, “yes”, you’re in good company – and a very large company at that! I can imagine that most of us can say yes to that question. As I write this I’m enjoying a pain free day – after more than a week of enduring a migraine headache – I’ve had my share of migraines over the years, and they’re never something I find myself readily accepting.

Pain is not an easy thing to accept. But this week I found myself more and more readily accepting the pain, getting curious about it, wondering how it was serving me – and asking myself what the “trick” was to accepting (and releasing) this pain.

I’m reminded of the scene in Lawrence of Arabia where Peter O’Toole puts out a flame with his fingers. When another man tries it he quickly exclaims that it hurts (!) and asks “What’s the trick?” “The trick,” Lawrence answers, “is not minding that it hurts.”

There is a lot of truth in that statement. When we can step into that place of “not minding”, that place of acceptance, that’s the place where we begin to see big shifts and serious magic. Why? Because that’s when we step into non-resistance.

In the practice of conscious creation we hear a lot about non-resistance. One of my favorite ideas to remember when I’m resisting anything is that “non-resistance is imperative to magic”. We just can’t create much when we are resisting something, except more of what we are resisting.

And although we may be quick to think that “resisting” is when we say “No” to something – such as the current political upheaval creating teeming crowds of “resistors” that are “resisting” or “saying no” to the current administration’s policies and actions – like Princess Leia leading her army, “The Resistance” to stand against (say “no”) to Darth Vader and his storm-troopers – when we resist this way (by saying “no”) we could label it “aversion” or “opposition”. This is usually what one thinks of when considering resistance.

However, there is also another form of resistance that actually seems more like saying “yes” – this is known as “Attachment”. In the same way that aversion is characterized by an inner energy of “saying no” – “NO NO NO, I don’t want this!”, Attachment is characterized by “saying yes” – or maybe more like “PLEEEEASE I’ve just gotta have this this this!” Attachment to specific outcomes often has the essence of begging and pleading in it – a very graspy type of energy.

Both positions, “NO NO NO!” and “PLEASE YES THIS PULEEEEZZZ!” are both forms of resistance. In both instances we are resisting “what is”. Resistance can be felt in the body. If you are wondering whether you are attached to a specific outcome just take a moment to scan your physical body for a sense of stress, or holding, or tension as you consider the circumstance.

When we are resisting what is, we are usually in the process of creating more of it.

The answer to this conundrum is acceptance. Acceptance leads to allowing.

By accepting what is we aren’t saying that we like it, love it, or want it to stay this way. We are just recognizing that “it is what it is” and realizing our own power in the situation.

We can go a bit further by adopting the idea that we actually created it this way for some reason that benefits us on some level. In some way, this thing is serving us. I like to get curious and ask myself, “Hmmmm how is this serving me? What am I loving about this situation?”

Once we get to this point of acceptance we can move into the place where we can choose something different – without striving, without aversion to what is, without attachment to specific outcomes, without resistance.

Non-resistance is imperative to magic. Acceptance is how we let the magic begin.

Love & Magic,

Cindie

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Pink Hats, Magic Spells, and Non-resistance

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This past weekend millions of women (and men!) marched all over the globe, peacefully, purposefully, powerfully – for the cause of equality. Many of them were wearing pink hats. I’m still wearing mine, here at my desk, as I type these thoughts.

I am a part of the LOA community, and I not only consider myself a spiritual person, but a magical person as well.

But not everyone in spiritual circles feels good about the idea of taking action. And it seems that many are confused and trying to choose the most spiritual path where taking action is concerned – “To act or not to act”, that seems to be a serious question right now for conscious creators. To speak up, or to keep silent.

This uncertainty is evidenced by the mixed messages being presented to our spiritual circles. Some want to call out those who aren’t speaking out or taking action, and some feel it is unspiritual or unenlightened to take action – saying that such actions are fear based, or rooted in anger and conflict, or not coming from a high enough vibration.

Here’s what we might be missing in this equation – the consideration of energy (the evidence of which is clearly seen in our emotions, beliefs, and actions.)

Energy covers a spectrum ranging from the lowest level which looks like despair and depression and shows up as lethargy to the highest level which is experienced as non-judgment and absolute passion and results in creation. At this highest level we create amazing and often miraculous results – at the lowest level we feel apathy, depression and suffering. The depths of despair, avoidance, and victimization are the hallmarks of the lowest level of energy.

As conscious creators we certainly want to reach for the higher end of the spectrum. And most of us will have to climb the ladder one rung at a time to get there, regardless of what level we are starting from.

At the bottom of the energy spectrum is victim energy – when we experience this level of energy we ask “Why is this happening to me?” This is the place where it seems that there are things happening to us that we have no control over – a place where many people are finding themselves right now in this current political conflagration. And – it is basically impossible to leap up to the top of the energy ladder where absolute passion, nonjudgment and miracles reside when the leap we’re trying to take is from that lowest rung – it’s just too big of a leap. We have to reach the next possible rung first, which is actually the energy of conflict – this is the level where anger, competition, and defiance reside – here we get angry about what’s happening “to us”. And although most of us don’t like the way anger feels, it still is a slightly higher level of energy than victimhood. Our anger, when honored and acted upon appropriately, will bring the next rung of the ladder within reach – this is the level of responsibility and cooperation. This is the place where no one controls our emotions, it’s the place we choose forgiveness, and it’s also the place where we allow our anger to transform into productive action. All of our coping skills exist in this range of energy as well. Think about someone who has been mistreated and is simmering in their anger about the injustice they’ve experienced – when they decide to take action to begin the process of turning things around – they’re moving up the ladder and getting closer to the energy of compassion and concern – emotions that are often evidenced by the actions of true service. This is where compassion and concern get a chance to shine. And from this place of service we can easily imagine and entertain ideas of how things could be better for everyone involved. A win-win seems possible from this vantage point. And being able to see a win-win will bring us even closer to the place where we can reach up for joy – and from there we can tap into the wisdom of the collective unconscious and from here it’s not too far to the top of the ladder where life is created each moment using all of the other levels at will, without fear. I often call this energy level the “Jesus level” or maybe the “Dalai Lama” level *wink* – because if we could actually resonate on that level all of the time we could walk on water. This is the level that creates miracles. Very few people have ever managed to consistently live there at the top. Most of us have to climb the ladder, one step at a time, maybe even on a daily basis.

The current political environment is frightening to many people. In some spiritual communities there seems to be a semi shaming of anyone taking “fear based actions” – but there is no shame in feeling fear. Ask any woman who has narrowly escaped being raped. Fear is a very useful emotion, as is anger. When we feel fear or anger we are receiving very important information. It is crucial to know what to do with those emotions, and deciding it is wrong to experience fear or anger is not useful. In fact, hiding those emotions, acting as if they don’t exist, stuffing them down, pasting a smile over them and pretending that everything is fine is exactly the strategy that results in women staying in abusive relationships.

The world we experience is always mirroring back to us what we believe. It doesn’t serve us to look away from the mirror. We look into a mirror to check our hair, to see if we have food in our teeth; we look, we decide what needs fixing, and we fix it. We don’t argue with the mirror, we don’t smash the mirror, we just take the action we need to change the reflection. What we are seeing in politics and our government right now is a reflection of who we are collectively as a nation. We have to be willing to see it if we’re going to fix it. We can’t heal our shadow if we aren’t willing to see it. And in light of what we are seeing, it seems obvious that our collective energy level is nowhere near the top of the energy scale, and it’s too far to leap to the top in one step.

I’m the first person that wishes we could wave a magic wand and see this whole mess change into something wonderful for everyone. I’m not opposed to magic, prayer, focusing, visioning, believing, and having faith. In fact, I rely on these things. And, I also know that magic works best when it is married to the mundane. We live in a mundane world that requires mundane action. Do I believe that miracles can happen? Of course. I also believe that it’s quicker for me to get a candy bar by walking down to the corner store and paying a dollar for it than by working a magic spell and sitting down on the couch to wait for the candy bar to come to me.

We often hear about the importance of “non-resistance” in conscious creation. But non-resistance doesn’t mean non-action. It is certainly possible to take no action at all and still be resistant from an energetic standpoint. A good example of this is the answer I get from so many women when I ask about conflict – they tell me that they never experience conflict with anyone. They choose to remain silent to avoid conflict. But when we keep silent because we don’t want conflict, the conflict just goes inward and then we struggle (resistance) with internal conflict.

Non-resistance doesn’t mean that we are willing to take abuse or accept any circumstance or behavior that comes our way; it just means we don’t energetically struggle against what’s happening. Our greatest weapon is not a violent one, but comes with acceptance of what is and then choosing the non-violent action to achieve what is better. This is how we resist without resistance. Anyone that practices martial arts will understand this type of “fighting without fighting” concept. We do whatever we do from a place of peace and acceptance. We have to first accept what is, and to do that we have to be truthful about what is. It doesn’t mean we like what is and want to keep it, it just means that we find the truth about it and then decide on right action.

A perfect example of this ‘resisting without resistance’ is the 2007 uprising in Burma where 100,000 Buddhist monks resisted non-violently, marching in the streets for democracy against a cruel military regime. Can you imagine the energy level of that particular group?

It has been said that we are spiritual beings having a human experience. That idea includes all of us. There are plenty of people heroes, past and present, who’ve been willing to stand up, speak out, and take action to change things for the betterment of the entire human race. We enjoy many freedoms because of their unselfish acts of heroism. I won’t dishonor these heroic actions by labeling them “unspiritual” or “unenlightened”.

There is a mundane world that requires mundane tasks, and there is also a world we can’t see with our physical eyes. Those of us who believe in things we cannot see are familiar with both worlds – we pray, and we work. We do magic and we take mundane action. Change comes because of both.

There will be those of us who take action without praying much. There will be those of us who work a lot of magic without taking mundane action. Those of us marching need those prayers. Those of us making magic will no doubt celebrate the victories of those who march.

I believe in magic. I believe I was born to traffic in miracles. I see things on a daily basis that can only be attributed to something preternatural. And, I also perform a variety of mundane tasks every day – I vote when there’s an election, donate to worthy causes, pay bills, do the laundry, make my bed every morning, and will probably be wearing my pink hat as an everyday accessory for the foreseeable future.

The choice to speak out or to take action is a personal one. I can’t make that choice for anyone but myself. But, we’re all in this together. We need each other – the prayer-warriors, the foot-soldiers, the magicians, the spell-casters, the marchers, the artists, the speakers, the writers, the poets, the activists – it’s going to take all of us.

We don’t have to act from a place of fear. We can act from a place of love, truth, and power – confident that the collective energy that occurs when we stand in unity can move mountains.

Love & Magic,

Cindie

 

 

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Bye-bye 2016.

As road-90390_1280I scroll through my social media feeds I see one common thread among all of the “trending topics”. Topics like politics and posts about so many of our favorite artists passing away. The common thread is basically a big “F*** you” to 2016. Like no other year I can remember, 2016 has been cast as the bad guy in a play that we all hoped would be a comedy, or a happily ever after story, but instead became a horror film for many of us, at the very least a drama for most. People on twitter and Facebook have been actually addressing 2016 as though it were a person, and a very bad, greedy person at that. In fact, John Oliver even ended his last show of the season with this send off for 2016.

I get it. As a woman who didn’t have the best financial year, spent the Summer watching her beautiful oak floors self-destruct because of water issues related to the Louisiana floods, attended too many funerals, and not only watched her candidate lose the presidential election but can easily begin to feel terrified watching the new President-Elect navigate storm through his transition with what seems to be a total disregard for decorum, social norms, honesty, common decency, and the multitude of qualities typically expressed by the word “Presidential” – I’m ready for a new year, too.

However, I want to encourage you (even as I encourage myself) not to move too fast into this new year. I want to suggest that we all slow down and at least take some time to recognize the good that we’ve experienced, maybe even the good that is a direct result of what we so easily label “the bad”.

It’s a proven fact that we all take loss harder than we appreciate the equal amount of gain. In other words when we gain a certain amount we feel good, but when we lose that same amount we don’t just feel bad, we feel worse than bad. There doesn’t seem to be a whole lot of relativity here, bad feels worse than good feels good. It hurts worse to lose $5 than it feels good to find $5. The technical term for this is “loss aversion” and it’s why we prefer avoiding losses. Here’s an article that explains it better if you care to have a better explanation.

The emotional pain connected to the losses we’ve experienced this year have a very real effect on us. And for most of us our reaction is that we want to get the hell out of dodge as soon as possible. It’s a bit like running out of a burning building, every bone in our body urges us to run like hell and not stop until the smoke clears. We just don’t want to experience anymore loss, anymore pain. I believe this is why I keep seeing posts on social media that say “2016, just get it over with and end already!” It seems that many of us wish we could throw 2016 out like a visitor that has overstayed his welcome.

I certainly don’t want you to experience more pain. But I do want to encourage you to understand what treasures are hiding beneath the painful experience.

Personally, I feel a renewed desire to be empowered, to speak my truth, to be authentic and open about who I am and how I live. I also recognize that the best thing I can do to support my own empowerment is to increase my self-care and spiritual practices, like meditation, yoga, tai chi, and to make more time for creative practices that feed my soul – things like knitting, drawing, painting and writing. Self-care and self-love practices are the foundation for everything else we create. For me, they are what my empowerment rests upon.

Pain can teach us what we value. It provides the contrast that allows us to have more clarity about what we do want. But suffering is another story – literally. Most of our suffering happens because we create stories and thoughts and ideas about what our pain means, and more often what it means about us and for us. Pain is part of life. I hate saying that, because no one enjoys pain, but the truth is we are wired for pain! We have pain sensors in our bodies, in our skin. However,  suffering doesn’t have to be a daily part of our experience. When we begin to run away from painful experiences we suffer. When we begin to argue with what is we suffer. We end up with a lot of thoughts in our head that produce stress and worry. We begin to experience fear about the future. When we can instead accept the painful fact of our experience (instead of arguing with it) we can use that same energy to transform the experience into something that will serve the world.

I’m not saying for one minute that we should accept the injustice we see in the world that causes pain. I’m saying that by accepting the fact that it IS, we can then formulate a clear path to a better place, a clear plan to bring about change. When we can face the painful circumstance and see it for what it is, only then can we make a plan to deal with it effectively, to learn from it, to choose a different course, to be the change we want to see in the world.

A few of the questions I’m asking myself as 2016 comes to a close: How have the events of this year affected me personally? What emotions have come up? How can I transmute those painful emotions into energy that will make the world a better place? What would I rather see, and how can I take action to move towards that end?

Once I’ve slowed down and spent a bit of time answering those questions for myself, I plan on creating a plan forward for this New Year. I’m expecting it to be powerful.

I wish us all a new year that won’t overstay its welcome. A year full of peace, prosperity, liberty and justice for all…and of course a big dose of Love & Magic,

Cindie

 

 

P.S. If you’d like some help and support navigating your own clear path through 2017 I’d love to be your coach. Here’s how you can work with me.

 

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Spell & Rituals

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Spells and rituals…or maybe you refer to them as prayers and practices, or devotions and celebrations.

Whichever language you like to use, these things are on my list of human needs. We have our basic needs, like air, water, food, shelter, sleep, and sex. Beyond that we have many needs as humans – among them are things like connection, creative expression, spirituality, ceremony, ritual, solitude, community and contribution.

So often we tend to forget that we have other needs besides just the most basic. And as women, wives, mothers, caretakers, we can often get so busy taking care of everyone else we sometimes neglect even our most basic needs, let alone the other more esoteric needs we may have.

I remember coaching a nurse and during our session I had an intuitive hit to ask her if she was drinking enough water. I almost didn’t ask the question because it seemed too basic, so practical, and so, well…non magical. But my intuition kept nagging at me so I asked. It seemed like a silly question until she told me that she often worked a 12-hour shift with only one bathroom break and “really no time to get a drink of water”. This was a women who had devoted her life to taking care of other people and she was struggling to find enough time in the day to take care of even her most basic needs.

In a world where even our basic needs don’t always get met, it seems almost impossible sometimes that we’ll find the time for ritual, or for celebration, or for creative expression.

And yet, when we give those needs the priority they deserve, when we honor ourselves beyond our basic needs, time seems to expand and we enjoy healthier, happier lives, more magic and even miracles.

Vedantic philosophy teaches that there are only two symptoms of enlightenment. The first is that you stop worrying, the second is that you experience more meaningful coincidences – also known as magic, or miracles.

If we are living at such a pace that we can’t find time to drink enough water, or eat right, or get enough sleep we certainly aren’t at a place where we can stop worrying and experience magic.

As human beings we are wired to create miracles, just by virtue of our powerful minds, our energetic make-up, our ability to connect. But we always create from our foundation, and this is where basic needs being met is so important. Our bodies, our minds, our hearts, our health – this is our foundation – this is what we are creating from, so taking good care of ourselves is fundamental to making magic.

Radical responsibility is the first step towards enlightenment, and getting our own needs met is our first responsibility as conscious creators. First our basic needs, then our deeper needs. Once our needs are met we have more energy, and a stronger foundation to work towards helping others get their needs met.

Start with making sure your basic needs are met well, and then see how you can add some of your deeper needs into the mix. Carve out some time to be creative, make sure you spend some time in quiet solitude as well as some time connecting with others, make a point to practice meditation and ritual, follow the moon cycle, create an altar, plant a garden, celebrate even the small victories in your life. Experiment until you find the rituals and practices that feed your soul.

When you take good care of yourself by taking full responsibility for getting your own needs met you send an energetic message to the Universe that having your needs met is important to you. This is some of the most powerful spell-work you can do!

Making magic begins with taking care of yourself. Begin with a deep breath. Magic always happens in the present moment, start now.

Love & Magic,

Cindie

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The Ebb & Flow of a Spiritual Practice

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Today someone told me that they were inspired by my spiritual practice, and they bemoaned that their own practice came in “fits and starts”.

I’m flattered by the admiration, but honestly my practice has it’s own ups and downs, for sure – and I’ve decided that I’m okay with that. But it hasn’t always been easy for me to understand that it is indeed okay.

I used to beat myself up because I couldn’t get in the groove of journaling every single day – it felt like I wasn’t consistent in my journaling practice. And since I love beautiful journals I felt guilty every time I bought another one since I had a whole shelf full of beautiful empty journals. The thing I wasn’t giving myself credit for was that I also had a stack of journals that were indeed full of written pages. Then I realized that my practice was very consistent, it just wasn’t daily. My practice had a flow, a pattern, and it worked for me. I picked up journaling and morning pages when I needed them, sometimes that was everyday for weeks or months at a time, sometimes it was just once a week, sometimes I’d go for long stretches of not journaling at all.

I still journal this way, that’s my practice. It’s what works for me.

My yoga practice flows the same way. My meditation practice, although somewhat more regular from day to day, has it’s own ebb and flow, too.

Yes, I do have parts of my practice that are consistent in a daily way, but for my spiritual practices as a whole there is an ebb and flow. Sometimes my spiritual practice for the day is reading. Sometimes writing. Sometimes both.

Sometimes I meditate, or do yoga, or both.

Sometimes a long walk is a powerful spiritual practice.

And I think that’s just fine, since nature has an ebb and flow. Life has ups and downs. We have seasons.

The German philosopher Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel said that “matter is spirit fallen into a state of self-otherness” . His idea has often been interpreted in the thought that “we are not humans having a spiritual experience, we are spiritual beings having a human experience.” If this is true, then we can’t not have a spiritual practice. We are spiritual beings. Our life is our practice.

Right now I’m in the middle of my course MOONLIGHT and this is a big part of what we’re practicing in that course – we’re following the moon cycle so we’ve got the perfect heavenly clock to support us with our own personal ebb and flow, our cycle of receiving and releasing. Waxing full and then waning. Over and over. Life is a cycle, a process.

Any athlete will tell you that the rest is just as important as the work. We need stillness, we need activity. Ebb and flow.

Seeds need time to germinate. Seeds spend lots of time underground in the dark, and from above it looks like nothing is happening. But in reality everything is happening!

We don’t always recognize that our “waning phases” are as important as our “waxing phases” but that’s the cycle, the journey, the ebb & flow. It’s a process.

Trust the process.

Love & Magic,

Cindie

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Just Say Yes

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How often do you say “No” by default?

We mold our life by the stories we tell about ourselves, whether we tell them with actual words (which we do often) or by our actions.

So often we say we want certain things (true love, more money, better health, less stress), and yet the story we tell of ourselves is actually saying NO to those very things.

You say you would like to find true love, but your story says “I’m not really all that social. I like to stay in and don’t get out much to meet people, and besides all of the good ones are taken.”

You say you want to make more money but your story says “We aren’t like ‘those snobby rich people’ and besides who would want a house that big anyway? I’m happy to have a paycheck.  I’m proud of my ability to stretch a dollar.”

You say you wish you were in better health but your story says “I’ve never been very athletic and I can’t believe how much organic food costs, besides I’ve been skipping breakfast my whole life.”

You say you want less stress in your life but your story says “I’m a news addict, really, I basically have CNN on 24/7 because it’s really important to me to keep up with what’s going on in the world.  I’m so glad I can get by on 5 hours of sleep a night because I am super busy!”

Some of these “stories” might seem extreme, but do you see how incongruent our stories can be?

One of my core philosophies is that the Universe is ALWAYS supporting me.  And I totally believe that.  BUT…I’ve got to say YES – with my words, with my actions, with my BEING.

So often our stories have programmed us to say NO, whether in words or actions. Are you writing a story that says “no” to what you want?

I want to encourage you to start saying “yes” to the things you want.

Change your story.  Maybe just a little bit.

Get open to new possibilities.

Go out and meet some new friends. Realize that money isn’t evil.  Go for a walk.  Eat something healthy.  Turn the TV off and meditate for 20 minutes.  Take a break from the “news”.  Get some extra sleep.  Smile more.

Say YES.

Love & Magic,

Cindie

 

 

P.S. If you are ready to say “Yes” to LOVE, join me for MOONLIGHT – A Course in Manifesting Love. Registration is open now through October 7, 2016.

 

 

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MOONLIGHT is now open for registration!

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So pleased to announce that registration is now open for MOONLIGHT – A Course in Manifesting Love! Register here.

Love & Magic,

Cindie

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Lessons Learned

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“Nothing ever goes away until it teaches us what we need to know.” ~Pema Chodron

When I’m attempting to manifest a particular outcome and it just isn’t happening I often question my readiness. I think I want a certain thing, and I do really want it, but am I ready for it? That’s my big question. Because in my way of thinking, if I was ready for it I’d have it.

But one day it dawned on me that maybe something else was happening.

Ever have one of those dreams where you are back in high school? I know I’m not the only one, I have this conversation every so often and am never surprised to hear the same variations on this dream over and over again – “I can’t find my locker, I can’t remember my locker combination, I don’t know where my class is, I don’t have my books, I’m supposed to be taking an exam and I didn’t study”…and on and on. Familiar?

Whenever I have one of those dreams I remind myself that I’m “back at school” – I’m learning something. It causes me to perk up and pay attention to what lessons I’m currently learning…and what patterns I’m currently living. Because, as the wise Pema Chodron writes: “Nothing ever goes away until it teaches us what we need to know.”

Often people seek out a coach because they keep having the same problem over and over and finally decide that they need a bit of help and support to solve it. Usually the thing that we are trying to solve is an outward expression of an inward pattern. The outward expression is often obvious, the inward pattern sometimes isn’t. Those of us who coach people for a living get pretty good at spotting certain patterns over and over. Once a pattern is uncovered we can then shift it, that is where some of the really amazing coaching magic happens.

Often uncovering a pattern feels like finishing the big exam. Phew. Wow.

A sense of relief is often the signifying emotion.

A few weeks ago I was speaking with a client. I was explaining to her that because she had experienced a certain thing – a certain pattern – that she did not have to experience it anymore. We brainstormed about what big lessons she had learned and I likened it to graduation – I told her that she learned that lesson and that she didn’t have to learn it twice. This caused her to relate to me a back to school dream she once had. In her dream each classroom door had a list of the student’s names on it. She went to each door but couldn’t find her name on any classroom, so she asked a teacher she saw about it. The teacher said to her, “Your name isn’t there because you’ve already passed this class. You don’t need to be here.”

I think that was the best back to school dream I’ve heard of yet.

Sometimes even though we’ve learned a lesson, we continue to experience the “class” over and over by way of habit, by way of our habitually inhabiting a certain energetic space in which that particular lesson is being taught. Going through the motions of learning that lesson becomes a pattern, it becomes our story, and we keep experiencing it over and over. And there isn’t always a powerful headmaster outside of our self who is going to take our name off of the list and bar us from coming back to the class. We have to take that responsibility for ourselves. We can consciously recognize that we’ve learned the lesson, and excuse our self from class.

We can do this when we’re ready. Once we’ve understood the pattern, allowed the experience, acknowledged the learning, applied the lesson.

And then guess what? Time for a new lesson.

Are you ready for a new lesson?

I’d love to hear all about your “back to school” dream experiences, lessons you are finished with, new lessons you’re ready for, and anything else that comes up for you around this discussion! Leave me a comment below!

Love & Magic,

Cindie

 

 

P.S. If you’d like some assistance uncovering those patterns that are keeping you stuck, be sure to check out my Summer Magic Jumpstart program. It’s open until the end of summer…and then it’s gone! Get in while you can. 🙂

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You Are Enough

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I know something about you…maybe it’s an idea you’ll find hard to accept, or want to argue about. That’s okay. Because I don’t have to look into a crystal ball to know it’s true.

In fact, it is Truth with a capital T: You are enough.

A few weeks ago I had a realization – I was finding some results less than satisfactory and I immediately began questioning what I was doing – and hearing a voice in my head saying that I wasn’t doing enough, I should be doing this, trying that, applying a little more of this, and certainly doing a WHOLE lot MORE of THAT. (BIG CLUE: when you’re hearing “shoulds” – wrong thought path! Warning warning!)

And then I stopped myself – and I realized that pretty much any time I’m frustrated at my results and start to think I need to do MORE, be MORE, have MORE of something going on it is a direct symptom of my thinking that I’m not enough.

Now, to be sure, I’m not talking about the intuitive nudge that sometimes says, “Why not try this?” or “That could be a different way to do this!” – and sure enough, we get better results.

I’m talking about the nagging, critical, unfriendly voice that chides us and scolds us that we’re not enough.

How many “not enoughs” can you recognize in your thinking patterns?

Does that inner voice tell you you’re not productive enough, thin enough, curvy enough, smart enough, pretty enough, funny enough, serious enough, playful enough, generous enough, educated enough, loving enough, intuitive enough, wealthy enough, frugal enough, spiritual enough, down to earth enough, logical enough?

And when we make those judgments about our self we create a reality that proves us right. We will always create a reality that proves our beliefs, so if we believe that voice every time it tells us we are not enough we will automagically create an unhappy outcome full of punishing events, because judgment and guilt bring punishment, you cannot have the “guilty as charged” judgment without creating some sort of punishing experience down the road.

So, today, I want to suggest recognizing that you are enough. You may not believe it yet, but just decide that you are going to adopt this belief. It doesn’t matter what objections come up. It doesn’t matter if it doesn’t feel true, or if you feel awkward saying it. Just decide to believe it today.

Write it on a post-it and put it on your mirror. Or go a step better and do what I did – I bought a chalk marker from the hobby store and wrote “I AM ENOUGH” on all of my mirrors. It’s such a nice reminder that now every time I use a mirror I smile, and I can tell that my subconscious is beginning to believe it.

And that’s what’s important. There has to be agreement between the subconscious mind and the conscious mind. That agreement is often referred to in magic as the alchemical wedding. A marriage of conscious and unconscious beliefs creates super powers.

“I am enough” – This belief alone can destroy the limits you’ve currently placed on yourself.

And don’t worry – believing that you are enough doesn’t mean that you won’t want to make improvements, or make more money, or lose a little weight, or gain a few pounds, or become more educated, more generous, more loving, more spiritual, or whatever it is you’re desiring.

You will still want to do these things. The nature of Nature is that it wants to expand. You’re wired to grow, to flourish, to learn, to discover.

But you won’t be pursuing those things because you’re trying to be “enough”. You’ll be doing it because you recognize that you ARE enough. And that recognition will allow you to achieve your goals with a power you didn’t have access to before.

You are enough. Believe it.

Love & Magic,

Cindie

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How to Sleep Better Tonight

sleeping beauty vintageThis morning I ran across Monte Farber’s Instagram post on his bedtime ritual for better sleep. (<—a teensy tiny insta-read and totally worth it.)

This is pretty much the exact same bedtime ritual that I’ve been using lately, basically a form of meditation that cultivates the practice of benevolence, known as “metta” or “compassion meditation”. This is well known practice within Buddhism  and Buddhist canon actually says that a person who practices compassion meditation “sleeps easily, wakes easily, dreams no evil dreams.”

The idea of forgiveness, and maybe especially self-forgiveness, has been coming up for me a lot lately. I’ve been coaching clients around some tough forgiveness issues, and I’ve been practicing forgiveness in a deeper way myself.

In a world where there is so much polarity, so much mudslinging, so many grudges, gripes, and grievances – it isn’t a wonder that insomnia is so prevalent.

Forgiveness is not always easy. Our ego tries to convince us that in forgiving we are condoning bad behavior, but that’s just not true. In forgiveness we are just recognizing that everyone is doing the best they can at any given time. We are recognizing that we can let go of the past and move forward even stronger than before, wiser than before, more experienced than before. Forgiveness takes us out of Victimland and gives us back our power.

When we choose to forgive we are setting our self free. Holding a grudge only holds US down. Grudges bind us to the painful event in consciousness, and why on earth would we want to do that to our selves? I’ve heard it said that holding a grudge is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die – the idea being that we are only hurting our self when we have unforgiveness. I agree that we are hurting our self when we hold a grudge, and we also hurt the whole of humanity because after all, we are all one.

Recently I wrote a Huffington Post article that mentioned the idea of “sacred contracts” – another perspective that may support you in forgiving. I’ve written a blog post on why self-forgiveness is essential. I have an interest in forgiveness because when we forgive we free our selves and others from judgment and guilt and the punishment that comes along with it, and in doing this we open up new pathways of abundance, for our selves, and for the planet.

And, the benefit of better sleeping, better waking, and no evil dreaming is pretty nice too.

Love & Magic,

Cindie

 

 

P.S. Finding forgiveness for yourself and others is something I can help you with. Have you checked out my Summer Magic Jumpstart private coaching program? Have questions about working with me? I’m happy to hop on the phone with you and answer any questions you may have, just send me a message and let me know you’d like to have a conversation!

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