Generally speaking if one person is asking for something, there are a bazillion others quietly looking for the same thing.
So, my answer to the question: “Can you suggest a resource to help me realize my own value and worth?”
Yes. Yes, I can.
Very simply, the resource is You.
Your actions, your words, your thoughts, your ideas are the very best and strongest resources you have to build your self-worth, self-esteem, self-value. You hold the key that opens the gate to the garden of your own self-worth.
It’s easy to think that we will value our self a bit more when someone else thinks we are awesome, when someone else is willing to pay us a lot, when someone else gives us a compliment, when someone else gives us an award, and yeah I’m on board with totally digging all of that too…
And all of that will start happening more often when we lead the way (and the energy) with our own actions, words, thoughts, and ideas.
Here are a few ideas to get you started on your own list of ways to up-level your self-worth.
1. Throw out the whole idea of what you “deserve” or “don’t deserve”…and while you are at it stop deciding that other people “deserve” things too, (good or bad). The whole concept of “deservedness” creates a lot of stress, and generally speaking we do NOT get what we deserve, and when we allow ourselves to believe in that whole concept sooner or later
we get screwed something happens to us that “we don’t deserve” and then our self-worth takes another dive. I realize that letting go of this deeply ingrained concept may not be easy for you to do. It’s hard for me too – for instance – My Handsome Sweetheart and My Amazing Sons and Yuki the Wonderpuppy – I think they are all the best thing that ever happened and that they ONLY DESERVE THE MOST FANTASTIC EVERYTHING…and so what happens when they get something shitty instead? Yep, I feel like they DO NOT deserve anything less than fabulous. Ever. So, yes, I slip up too, but just for today, let’s let go of it. Just. For.Today.
2. Invest in yourself. The two places that always show what we are committed to (what we value) are our calendar and our checkbook. We spend our time and our money on what we value. So investing in yourself is an action that you automatically take when you value yourself. If you haven’t been investing in yourself you can start now. Maybe it is a $10 eBook, maybe it is a much larger investment. You don’t have to break the bank, but you might have to stretch yourself a little. Get a coach, hire a part-time assistant, take an online class, buy an eBook. The key here is investing in yourself. Yes, there are A LOT of great FREE resources out there, and I want you to take advantage of them, too. AND if you want others to value you and see that you are totally worth whatever you are charging or asking for then you have got to be willing to lead the way, show up, put your money on the table, and make an investment in yourself.
3. Pamper yourself. This one does not have to break the bank either. Just treat yourself a little sweeter. Buy the premium box of widgets instead of the generic brand you usually get. Ask for whipped cream on top.
4. Be aware of how you talk to and about yourself. Be kind. Learn to receive a compliment (just smile, soak it in, and say “Thank you!”) Give yourself a compliment. Give yourself a break. Be gentle, be loving, be thankful. Treat yourself with great respect. If you wouldn’t say it about someone you greatly honor, value, love and respect, don’t say it about yourself.
5. Read this post about attracting LOVE into your life. It includes a list of slightly different actions to attract love with the same principles that this current post addresses.
There is only one real way to up-level your self-worth and self-value, and that is to take the actions that show you value yourself. Moment by moment, make the decision to treat yourself like the highly valuable person you are. You are of great worth and value to the world. Make the choice to act like it.
Love & Magic,
P.S. One way you can invest in yourself is to book a VIP day with me. Click here to see what one recent client said about her VIP day!