Last week I got a question from a reader asking “How to let the person down easily and painlessly when you don’t see a mutual loving future.”
First, let me say, your kindness is apparent from the fact that you care about breaking up with someone “easily and painlessly”, and that you desire a “mutual loving future”.
Congratulations on being a thoughtful and compassionate human being!
Now for the bad news…you only have control over your own actions, not someone else’s reactions or responses.
So, unfortunately there is no advice I can offer you that will guarantee that this will be easy or painless for her/him.
However, you can definitely take care to present your desires and observations gently and with lovingkindness.
Break-ups are generally not easy for anyone! And, if you are both honest you’ll both get that it isn’t working.
Because if it isn’t working for one of you, it isn’t working.
Take responsibility for your own feelings and desires and be brave about communicating them.
Recognize that your partner may be feeling less than fulfilled with your relationship too.
Opening up a dialog about the relationship with your observation that you just don’t see a mutually loving future is a beginning.
I’ve seen many caring individuals stay in a unhappy relationship because they didn’t want to hurt the other person. Settling for an unhappy relationship doesn’t serve anyone.
My belief is what is best for you, really will be best for both of you, in spite of how painful the break-up may be.
Great relationships happen when both parties are fulfilled, not when one party is staying in to avoid pain.
Best wishes to you both.
Love & Magic,
P.S. My new book The Peaceful Power Process contains the proprietary communication process my private clients rave about. This process makes any difficult conversation easier.