Do You Know These Magical Words?

Zan_Zig_performing_with_rabbit_and_roses,_magician_poster,_1899-2

“A person knowing the power of the word, becomes very careful of his conversation.”  Florence Scovel Shinn

What comes to mind when you hear the phrase “Magical Words”?

Words of love? Poetry? Prayers? Affirmations? Spells? Chanting? Sacred Writings? Love Letters? My blog? (kidding) Blessings? Songs? – All powerful words.  All-powerful words.

Lately I’ve been thinking about the magic and the power of words.  In fact the other night I dreamed all night that I had written an article titled “Magical Words”…so here we are.

Words, what would we do without them?! A friend of mine once told me a story about a silent retreat that he and his wife took. By lunch of the first day she was trying to spell a message to him with the carrot shreds in the salad. Words are such a necessary part of our daily life, we hardly know what to do when we can’t use them. And we use a lot of them. (especially me.)

Powerful words.We bless, we pray, we affirm, with words.

Many creation myths tell of the world being spoken into existence.

In the 15th century the “Sefer Raziel HaMalakh” (a Jewish text ‘The Book of Raziel the Angel’) presented a teaching about the power of speech.

The famous conjuring phrase of magicians the world over, “Abracadabra”, comes from the Aramaic “Avra” (I will create) “Cadabra” or Hebrew “Kedoobar” (as was spoken). Abracadabra – I will create as was spoken.

How careful we would become regarding our conversations if we really understood the power of our words…and  not just our conversations with others, but the conversation (usually an ongoing stream of words) that we have with our self, those 60,000 words per day that are our thoughts – the words we speak in our inner conversation.

We indeed create our experience with words.

Almost everyone I know can remember a time as a child where someone spoke something to them that has stayed with them to this day, years and years later.  Whether it was a word of hope, of encouragement, of blessing, or words of criticism, hatred, or shame.  Many times those words still have power years later. Power to create beliefs and stories and experiences.

The book of James in the Christian bible admonishes us, “Out of the same mouth proceeds both blessings and cursings, brethren these things ought not to be!”

Can we expect results from our own affirmations for our personal prosperity and wellness and yet continue to speak words of resentment or tell stories that foster our unforgiveness?

Resentment and unforgiveness will block you from being in the flow of abundance like nothing else can block you. Here’s the fix – Stop telling the story of how someone hurt you, forgive them and let it go.  They hurt you once, and by telling the story over and over and over you hurt yourself many times more. Your brain and nervous system and body experience those painful emotions every time you tell the story.

Forgiveness opens the door to abundance. Resentment nails that door shut.

By forgiving someone you aren’t agreeing with what they did.  You aren’t “letting them get away with something.” You’re just freeing yourself from the results of unforgiveness and you’re making the choice to heal.  Telling the story over and over keeps the wounds open.  Move on.  Recognize what you learned from the opportunity and apply it. And if you are having trouble, reach out and get help.  Get a coach, or a therapist, to help you move through it.

Believe that you can heal.  Believe that you can create abundance.  Believe in miracles.  Believe that everyone is doing the best they can at any given time.

We choose our beliefs.  Our beliefs inform our thoughts.  Our thoughts create our stories, and those stories are comprised of the words that create our experience.

Our words literally speak our life experience into existence. Our words are powerful…

And other people’s words only have whatever power we give them.

It’s our own words that have the power to change and direct (for better or worse) our own lives.

How many of us can catch ourselves being resentful that someone whom we think is undeserving of abundance is thriving?  (or maybe we just think they’re “lucky”)

How many of us use mantras (all the time!!) like “I can’t afford it”, or “nothing ever works out for me”, or “She’s so lucky!” or “I wish I could have that but it will never happen for me” or how about “all the good men (or women) are taken” – ALL powerful words that will create what we experience.

And if we keep speaking those words on a continual basis we continue to create poverty, lack, ill health, loneliness, “bad luck” and all manner of misery and suffering for ourselves.

Believe me, I’ve created some suffering of my own in my life, and I recognize now how I did it, and I take full responsibility for it, which  means that I’m not suffering now.

I do experience pain because life can be painful.  But suffering is another story.  As they say, “Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.” Here is why it’s an important distinction to make…

Your suffering is never going to evolve into your bliss. Never.

The fastest way I know of to move from suffering to bliss is to change your language.  Change your words.

Stop using words like “have to”, “can’t”,  “should” and “need” for starters. (More about that here)

Now look, I’m NOT talking about being a Pollyanna and ignoring our uncomfortable feelings.  All of our feelings are miraculous, they’re all valid, and we need them ALL – they give us great information. And if we are smart we can take that information about how we are feeling and use it very wisely.  We can also choose the words we want to use and choose the stories we want to tell to create more pleasurable feelings and emotions.

I recognize that sometimes we think we don’t have enough (usually about money) so another trick I love is to

1. STOP saying there is not enough (If you are still here and still alive then somehow there has been enough!) and

2. Actively and consciously recognize that there is usually WAY more than enough. I need a tea bag to make a cup of tea and I have about a hundred of them in the drawer – more than enough.  I need about a teaspoon of shampoo to wash my hair, and I have almost a whole bottle, WAY more than enough.

Do you see where I’m going with this?  All the times you want to say “I don’t have enough (usually about money), realize that in most areas, right this minute, you have MORE than enough.

Everytime you have more than you need, be aware of how abundant you actually are! (Bonus points for actually saying it out loud! Powerful words! “I HAVE WAY MORE THAN ENOUGH!!”)

We all have bad days, we all have shitty experiences, but we don’t have to suffer endlessly over them.

One of my favorite ways to “reframe” and shift my perspective during one of “those times” is to say this: “This experience [fill in the blank with actual thingie that sucks] SUCKS, and it’s also giving me the opportunity to [fill in blank – be creative – look at the bright side – SEE the opportunity.]

Like this: “Spilling all of these coffee grounds on the floor sucks, and it’s also giving me the opportunity to get the floor a lot cleaner than it was a few minutes ago.”  In fact, I ACTUALLY said that because it ACTUALLY happened.  I dropped the full coffee filter full of used coffee grounds on the floor, and you know what, it sucked.  I was pissed.  I was in a hurry.  AND I used those exact words. “This sucks AND it’s giving me the opportunity to have a much cleaner floor.” Then I burst out laughing. Then I cleaned up the coffee grounds, mopped the floor…and only 10 minutes had passed and yes, I absolutely had a cleaner floor than I did before I dropped the coffee filter. (Because I hate mopping so it really was time to mop. LOL.)

In time and with enough practice maybe I’ll be able to skip the sucky part altogether and jump right to the opportunity part.

Having a crappy experience might give you a much bigger opportunity than a clean floor.

It might give you the opportunity to forgive, to be patient, to heal, to love (even maybe to love someone who seems really unlovable), and to make magic.

Words are magical and powerful. What words are you using to create your life experience?

Love & Magic,

Cindie

P.S. Have you joined us over at The Love & Magic Salon yet? It’s a FREE PRIVATE FACEBOOK COMMUNITY and it’s for you!  Come visit, hangout, play, and make magic with us.

Free Private Facebook Community! The Love & Magic Salon

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in Coaching, Communication, Conscious Creation, General, Magic, Personal Growth | 22 Comments

Why the World Needs You to be Authentic

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Over at the Love & Magic Salon there has been a discussion about authenticity, and how to navigate social expectations that might be in opposition to what we feel is our own Truth.

I understand, it can be really hard to “be yourself”.

And of course, we have to find our self first.

In the process of finding and becoming ourselves we often run into a few brick walls and barbed wire fences – metaphorically of course. (If you are running into literal brick walls or barbed wire then your problem is most likely something other than your blossoming authenticity.) *wink*

We grow up to a veritable chorus of voices chiming in all around us to make sure we know who we should become.  “You are such a great little painter, you should be an artist,” or “You are really smart, you should become a lawyer”.

“You are going to make such a wonderful [fill in blank].”

We hear these encouragements over and over. And the people who say them to us (parents, teachers, relatives, neighbors, etc.) generally want the very best for us.

Somewhere along the line we also get impressed with what we should not do or be. Don’t be a brat. Don’t tell lies. Don’t get into trouble. Don’t do this. Don’t do that.

Don’t dye your hair green and please do NOT get a tattoo. sigh.

From day 1 we are literally encouraged and discouraged repeatedly towards one group of shoulds and away from a long list of should-nots. All with the very best intention for our highest good. Except when it isn’t.

And then…somewhere along the line we may realize that what everyone else wants and what everyone else thinks might not be exactly what is best for us. And…if we move an inch in one direction or the other there is a very real possibility of disappointing someone.

Oy. None of us want to be a disappointment.

On a larger scale this plays out in society too…we don’t want our community to “look” at us a certain way, or “see us in a bad light” or have the wrong opinion of us.

Here’s the thing, Lovebirds…you can’t please everyone all the time, anyway.

And you cannot fulfill your purpose here in the biggest, fullest, brightest way if you aren’t true to yourself.

Understand that as you become the truest version of yourself, your light will shine brighter and brighter. And bright lights are going to scare some people away.

And that same bright light will draw others to you.

And some of the people who back away from you will get curious tomorrow and want to come back and take a peek. They’ll remember the deeper things about you, the things they love, the things they trust, the parts of you they feel a kinship with.

And some of them will reach out to you again.

The qualities that will be magnified by your choice to be authentic will be the very same qualities that you need to navigate your way.

The loss of light and power we agree to when we decide to hide who we are is so much greater than the societal approval we lose when we allow our inner truth to shine forth.

There are no missing pieces in the Universe, and no extra pieces either.

And it isn’t your job or responsibility to convince anyone else of what is right for you.

You have a purpose here. And that purpose requires you to be authentic…to be exactly, precisely, who you are with no hiding, no faking it, no masks.

Because when you hide, when you fake it, when you wear a mask – you dim your light.

The world needs you to be shining as brightly as possible right now.

So shine bright.

I know you can.

Love & Magic,

Cindie

 

 

 

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Q&A: How Do I Create Balance?

balanced rock rosemary ratcliff

 

 

One of the beautiful members of The Love & Magic Salon asked about creating Balance, and because I love my Salon members, I got right on it.

And, I figured if Cassandra wanted help with finding balance, then you might too.

 

We hear about “balance” all the time, in fact there are even “life balance coaches” that specifically help people create balance in their lives.  Some people seem to think that balance is the be all and end all of successful living, while others think it is bogus – usually the people that want to throw them self into one project at a time – I’m guilty of belonging to both groups.   I guess I’ve struck a balance between the two.  (Sorry, bad pun.  But I couldn’t resist.)

Here’s the deal, balance is something we bring ourselves back to.

That amazing rock in the picture above was left behind by retreating glaciers in the last Ice Age. That rock sits perfectly balanced on top of another rock in Haida Gwaii. Even the 7.6 earthquake of October 2012 didn’t disturb it. That is amazing balance.

And, we are not rocks that can achieve balance and then remain there forever (or for an ice age). We are not static.  We are human.  We move, we fall, we get back up.

We have feelings and emotions and sometimes we have a lot of work  to do and sometimes there is a big opportunity to play and sometimes even though we have our calendar all figured out, well… shit happens.

Sometimes life is going along just swimmingly and then a tragedy happens.  We lose someone we love,  we get laid off from our job, we get diagnosed with a terrible illness, we get divorced.  These times practically demand that we get “out of balance” for a while, that we allow ourselves to sink down into the grieving process, dive into a career search, immerse our self in healing modalities, spirituality, self-love, self-care, self-discovery.

So the key to balance is to be acutely aware when we are best served by being “in balance” or are better served by being “out of balance” for a season.  And then we can be intentional and make adjustments if we choose to.

When people first begin a meditation practice they often complain that they are having trouble “doing it right” because their mind keeps wandering.  But that is the whole point of meditating, that’s why it is a “practice”..because over and over we bring our self back to our center. We bring ourself back to focusing on the breath.  Over and over, the mind wanders, we bring ourselves back, the mind wanders, we bring our selves back, the mind wanders, we come back.  Until one day we realize that the mind didn’t wander as often, or as far.

Generally, life balance (sans tragedy or anything catastrophic happening) strikes me the same way.

At one point we may realize that we have absolutely no balance in some area (or between the areas).

Maybe we are focusing SO much on work or school that there seems to be little time for anything else.  So we take some time to play.

Or maybe we one day realize that we take care of everyone else but don’t spend much time or energy on self-care.  So we shift gears.

As we get intentional about balance we suddenly become more aware of when we are beginning to get out of balance and we begin to correct our course sooner.  This way we “stay” in balance.

Instead of waiting until we are starving to eat, we recognize hunger sooner and we take care of it.

Instead of waiting until we are completely sleep deprived, we notice our need for sleep sooner and we give our self an opportunity to rest.

Instead of giving away all of our power, we recognize that we are not keeping strong boundaries and we take a step to strengthen them.

Instead of waiting until any extreme forces us to regain balance, we make a course correction and become more balanced sooner.  In this way we have less of the “pendulum swinging from one extreme to the other” type of experience.

Like anything else, balance takes practice.  Like anything else we learn from our mistakes.  And like any other rule, we sometimes choose to break the rule of balance in favor of a short term goal. Like an athlete who runs a marathon, or a writer who stays up all night to meet a deadline.  The occasional extreme is sometimes necessary, it’s when we consistently swing from one extreme to the other that we get ourselves into a place where it takes more work to regain our equilibrium.

What areas do you struggle with keeping in balance?

Remember, there are no mistakes and no “shoulds”. Let Love guide you and everything will balance out in the end.

Love & Magic,

Cindie

 

 

P.S. Have you joined The Love & Magic Salon yet? It is a free community over at Facebook full of Love, Magic, and well, it’s Beautiful.  We uplift each other and support each other with our intentions and well, our “stuff”.  It’s a lovely place and I encourage you to come right over and join us.  It is a closed group, so once you get there just hit the “request to join” button.

Balanced Rock Photo
By Rosemary Ratcliff 

 

 

 

 

Posted in General | 6 Comments

Walking it Out

Always
When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems you cannot hold on a minute longer, never give up then for that is just the place and time the tide will turn. ~Harriet Beecher Stowe

This past week has been an amazing time of connecting, creating, and celebrating over at the Love & Magic Salon (a private Facebook Group for those who chose to participate in The 2014 Love & Magic Spring Invitational – and if you couldn’t make it this past week stay tuned, it was such a huge success we’ll be opening the doors and doing it again.)

Many seeds of Intention were planted and some of the seedlings sprouted so quickly we all were singing with joy at the magic we were seeing. Amazing synchronicities!

Then last night something woke me up in the night – the knowing that when intentions this strong are being made – I’m talking about serious public declarations and strong stands being taken – something else often happens.

The Universe begins to support us in ways we didn’t expect. And sometimes those ways are not as fun as the magic and singing and celebrating (and all the flat out JOY we’ve been having.)

No doubt you’ve heard the phrase, “walking your talk.” We all want to show up and do the things we say we’ll do, reach the goals we’ve chosen, basically be a person of integrity.

And what I’m talking about here is not just walking your talk.

This particular phenomenon is what I call it “Walking it Out.”

The twist is that walking it out often springs itself upon us before we know it, and sometimes it feels like the hardest climb we have ever taken.

The idea of walking your talk usually amounts to integrity—doing what we say we will do, or practicing what we preach. Pretty simple.

But this concept that I call “walking it out”, is the Universe subjecting the conscious intentions we make to a test—it is proving us.

I once heard someone admonish that if you are to pray for patience be prepared to find yourself in the longest lines and the worst traffic ever. In other words, be prepared to walk it out. Because how else can you practice patience except being in a place where it is required of you?

Whenever I find myself in a hard place (emotionally, financially, physically, or otherwise) I immediately question myself with this: “What am I walking out?” In other words, “What intention have I declared?”

And in my experience, the stronger the declaration, the quicker we are faced with the opportunity to walk it out.

Are you serious about what you are intending? If you are, you will no doubt find yourself in the position to “walk it out.”

It probably won’t feel good. It probably won’t be easy. It might require a leap of faith.

It will be worth it.

One belief that you can choose (yes, we choose our beliefs) that will help support you in walking it out is this:

Count yourself fortunate, as you are being given the opportunity to become something greater, something better, something more powerful, than you are in this moment.

When you come to the edge of all the light you know and are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing one of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. – Barbara Winter

The tide will turn, you will find solid ground (or fly!), and the sun really will come up tomorrow.

Here’s to walking it out. I know you can.

The Universe is ALWAYS supporting you.

Love & Magic,

Cindie

 

 

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Miracles Happen Every Day

blue butterfly

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”  ~ Albert Einstein

Do you need a miracle?

Because I want to offer you one.  At least, the beginning of one…the “seeds” of one. I want to help you plant it, and tend it, and rejoice with you as it sprouts and blossoms.

In those moments when what we need seems impossible or very far away it is often because of how big our need feels.  We need a miracle, a huge and seemingly impossible event.

But that’s the thing, like those huge oak trees that grow from acorns…what seems impossible often starts with the possible.  A small shift, an intention, a tiny seed of awareness.

Have you heard the term, “the butterfly effect”?  The butterfly effect is the idea that the formation of a hurricane is dependent upon whether or not a butterfly on the other side of the world flapped its wings several weeks earlier.  I’ve lived through several hurricanes, and they are BIG powerful events.  To think that a hurricane could be triggered by the delicate little flap of a fragile little butterfly wing thousands of miles away seems impossible, even ridiculous.  But we know that those little flapping wings have an effect, known as the butterfly effect.

Big things (miracles) begin very small most of the time.

The problem is, when we need that BIG thing it is sometimes difficult to recognize that a small move, a small action, a small shift in perspective, will make any difference at all.  And I want to tell you that it WILL.  When you are hungry, very, very hungry, when you have a BIG appetite, all you need is a meal.  And while you may joke about “being hungry enough to eat a whole cow” you really couldn’t do it if you tried.  One small meal would make all the difference in that moment.  It would change things.

When we feel lonely, and unloved, and needy…sometimes all we need is a hug, or a few kind words, or a smile, and things change in that moment.

And when things begin to change, even a little bit, we are moving in the direction of a possible miracle.  Miracles are not rare.  Miracles happen every day, and we can choose to expect them. And it helps to be looking for them.

I once heard a parable about a Native American walking down a crowded Manhattan Street with his friend, a Manhattan resident.  Right there amidst the noisy traffic and busy crowds he says to his friend, “Hey, listen, do you hear that? It’s a cricket.”  The native New Yorker answers incredulously, “Are you serious? No way do you hear a cricket! With all of these people yelling to one another, taxis with screeching brakes and honking horns, the subway roaring underneath us – with all of this noise how in the world can you hear a cricket?” The Native American answers, “Well, you have to be listening for it.”

We can take one small step at a time, and nurture and support each little action. The little acorn needs sunlight and water and time to grow into that big gorgeous tree.

Take small steps, plant some “seeds” and with the right nurturing and support you will begin to see miracles.

Join a group of like-minded people,  surround yourself with supportive friends and family, hire a coach, a mentor, a teacher, find some cheerleaders – these are important environmental factors that provide the love and the nurturing of you and your ideas, your goals, your intentions…the seeds that will eventually grow into miracles.

Miracles happen every day, and we can choose to expect them.

Love & Magic,

Cindie

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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The First Robin of Spring

RobinOnIce_TinaPhillipsFDP

Last week I came home to find my yard full of red robins. About 50 of them at least. And the fact that it was about 30 degrees outside didn’t seem to bother them.

Every year for at least the past 7 years or so, my son and I have always sent each other a text message whenever one of us sees the “first robin of Spring”. It has become a little ritual of sorts for us, and it always brings a smile to my face.

Generally it has been a warmish, sunny day, on or around the first day of Spring. But this year the robins made an early appearance, which really delighted me because I am seriously averse to cold weather and am SO ready for Spring.

This year, my text message to my son said, “FIFTY robins in the yard!”

And I’ve been pondering the robins, the Winter, the coming of Spring and everything that metaphor might hold ever since.

Robins are the heralds of Spring, and a symbol of new beginnings.

In times past Spring marked the beginning of the year. The Roman calendar began with the Ides of March (March 15th), between the 12th century and 1752 March 25th was the day the year changed in England and Ireland, the Persian New Year begins at the Spring Equinox, just to name a few examples. And of course we have many religious and traditional ritual celebrations connected with Spring, and the concept of rebirth, and new beginnings – along with all of the attendant symbols that represent new life and change (eggs, flowers, bees, butterflies, etc.)

So the thing that keeps coming up for me right now is the whole concept of “newness” that Spring brings. To me, Spring, just intuitively feels like the perfect place to have a “new beginning”.

Of course, Spring arrives after the cold, dark Winter. Those beautiful sprouts that finally push their way up through the hard soil have been down there in the cold, damp, dirt…strugging to fight their way up to the light of day, and having to deal with nasty bugs and worms.

That’s like life sometimes, yes? Our growth often happens in the cold, dark, lonely places. Places full of struggle and very little light. And then…suddenly Spring arrives. We see a bit of “light” – we get really clear about something we want (or something we no longer want to tolerate), our hope returns, and we feel new somehow.

What part of your life would you like to create anew? Health, Love, Money, Relationships, Career…or maybe just a new attitude, a new perspective, a new “you”, or a clean closet.

Something small, like a new habit or hobby? Or something big, like a new home or job or relationship? Or something in between?

I’d love to hear what you’d like to create anew this Spring, leave me a comment below and let’s talk about it!

Love & Magic (and red robins!),

Cindie

 

 

P.S. Whatever you’d like to create anew, I’m throwing a virtual party so we can create it together…

2014 Love Magic Spring Invitational

It’s a FREE 3-day Virtual garden party, and you are invited!

(Fancy hats and Faerie crowns are optional but highly recommended!)

Click here to RSVP! 2014 Love & Magic Spring Invitational

Click here to RSVP! 2014 Love & Magic Spring Invitational

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
 
 
 
“Robin on Ice” photo credit: Tina Phillips
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Everything you want…

Broken HeartBroken hearts…my logical mind keeps telling me that this is NOT something I should be writing about at Valentine’s Day.

BUT my intuition is coming at me full force about it…so I’m going to go with my gut here and just write.

Broken hearts happen for all different reasons…our hearts break because our relationships break, or end, or don’t meet our expectations.

We endure brokenheartedness because we endure loss, and loss is a common part of our human experience. All manner of losses – we lose lovers and loved ones, pets, health, finances, jobs and career opportunities, hopes and dreams. And loss is hard.

In fact, one study found that we fear loss twice as much as we appreciate gain, that we experience in double measure the pain of loss, as opposed to the pleasure of a similar gain. The technical term for this is loss aversion. We are wired to be averse to losses. Loss – we don’t like it. It doesn’t feel good. And when the loss is particularly painful, we often refer to it as “having our heart broken.”

So to some extent we’ve all experienced it, and I hate knowing that…I really hate knowing that you have experienced having your heart broken. Because I’ve been there, and it sucks.

I also know that everything you want is on the other side of your broken heart.

At one time I really tried to resist this particular aspect of my purpose, my calling, helping to bring more Love and more Magic into the world by helping people heal their broken hearts.

My logical mind (there she goes again) gave me lots of reasons to go in other directions, “There has to be something better”, ol’ logic brain would say. “Why would you want to spend so much time dealing in this area?” or “You have decades of knowledge and experience in the realm of nutritional healing, you should be a health coach” and “the real opportunities are in coaching around business, you’re a certified business coach, you should do that.” At times my left brain would even argue, “Why don’t you just read tarot cards for people, you’re amazing at it (wait was *that* my left brain?) or the constant whisper of “You’ll have to end up being a dating coach if you go into this relationship area you know.” And on and on and on the logical mind would argue and resist…

And I think that all of those logical thoughts are valid. I mean, Why? Why would I want to follow a path that in large part is a constant reminder of hearts being broken?

Broken by life’s dark side, broken by mean spirited beings who have ignored you or lashed out at you or dashed your dreams or counted you as unworthy.

Broken by hard knocks, and hard losses and missed opportunities and deception and disrespect or abuse or just getting dealt a bad hand.

Broken by unfairness, and illness, and too many years going by without realizing any big dreams (or not enough small dreams) coming true.

Isn’t that a really depressing arena to decide to work in?, I was asking myself.

But then one day I stood out in the sunshine, listening to birds sing and bees buzz and feeling so damn amazing that I had managed to manifest such a seriously wonderful life and relationship, and recognizing that it all came pouring forth out of my own broken heart, out of my own painful experience of heartbreak and healing and I realized that to me, right now, there could not be one single thing more powerful, more noble, more magical – than helping you heal up the places inside that feel broken.

Because here is what I know…

…that everything you want is on the other side of your broken heart

…that your deepest wounds are directly connected to your life purpose

…that there are NO missing pieces in the Universe, you are NOT just taking up space – you are precious, you are needed, you have a purpose, a calling, and you belong here.

And that you really do have what it takes to heal, to be whole, to be full of the most amazing and magical shining energy.

You have that power within you, I promise.

Sometimes it seems impossible to see beyond the pain of loss, the blinding all consuming pain of brokenheartedness. But once you begin to heal even a little bit, once you let the light in just a peep, once you begin to get quiet enough to listen to that still, small, strong, wise voice within you, those wishes and dreams and hopes start to get a foothold, a little nurturing and suddenly a sprout here and a sprout there, and finally a bud, a blossom and then a full bloom, and fruit.

Today I wish you Love. I wish you Peace. I wish you Healing and Wholeness.

I wish for you the experience of recognizing that the opportunities for more love and more magic and more of everything you want are right here, right now – right there on the other side of your brokenheartedness.

You are loved. 🙂

Love & Magic,

Cindie

 

 

 

 

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How to Follow Your Intuition

faucet-dripping

The most valuable tool I have in my metaphorical toolkit is my intuition.

I was born with a naturally strong intuitive sense, I’ve spent decades actively developing it further and I’ve created plenty of course curriculum to teach others how to use it…and I hate to admit that sometimes I still find myself struggling with it.

Intuition – that little inner voice nudging us in a certain direction, that “gut feeling” that we’ve all experienced and often ignore.  Have you ever been guilty of saying something like “I knew I should have listened to my intuition!” after ignoring and resisting it, sometimes for days on end? I have.

And yet, the longer I intentionally practice listening to my intuition, the easier and easier it gets.

It seems that logic is often at odds with intuition. Intuition suggests something and then Logic weighs in with every conceivable reason why it isn’t a good idea.

Intuition nudges and nags, while logic tends to argue.

I recognized this dichotomy this week…and I thought maybe telling you this story would help you recognize it in your own experience.

I had been having an intuitive nudge to work with a specific mentor. She had created a project and my intuition kept pointing me in the direction of creating something similar. You need to work with her, my intuition kept whispering. Reach out to her. Check out her website. See what support she can offer. Send her an email.

On and on and on…and I kept resisting, so the gentle whispering became more of a nagging…nag nag nag.

I say that smiling, with great respect and love for my intuiton, my higher self, and The Universe, of course.  Because I recognize that no one wants to be called a nag.  But here is the deal…it only felt like a nag because I was trying to ignore it and shut it out.

Seriously, my intuition was doing the dripping faucet thing. Drip Drip Drip. OMG. And you know what? Just like the dripping faucet – I realized it wasn’t going to fix itself. It is requiring something of me, for me to take some kind of action.

My logic on the other hand was drumming up every possible excuse to not listen to my intuition.

She might not have space in her group, maybe she doesn’t teach what you need, maybe her class is already full, you probably can just do this without help, you have a lot on your plate already, it might not be a good time to launch a new project or join a new group or hire another mentor or blah blah blah.

Here’s the thing – “logically speaking” all of those arguments are valid ideas if I choose to see them that way and take appropriate action by researching to find out the truth about them. IS her class full? DOES she teach what I need to learn?

But if I let those ideas become arguments that talk me out of following my intuition then those same ideas become a big stumbling block to my forward motion regardless of how “logical” they are.

Most of the time my intuition is very gently guiding me to discover something, to explore something, to do something very “doable”, (or at times maybe even to do “less”, to take it easier, to spend more time getting quiet, to stop drinking so much coffee <grin>).

But always it is guiding me with LOVE. In fact I often refer to my intuition as The Voice of Love.

Intuition is not an enemy of logic. In fact, they can become good friends if we allow them to work together.  Intuition is basically a ‘right brain’ function, and logic a ‘left brain’ function. And we certainly need all of our brain to have an optimum experience here on Earth as a human.

Our intuition works in the service of our soul, in the service of Love, in the service of our Life Purpose. Logic can be a wonderful tool in the process when we allow it to support our intuitiveness.

But logic can also be used in the service of our inner critic, in the service of Fear (all in the name of safety, of course). We always want to be safe, and sometimes it seems that our intuition is asking us, nudging us, nagging us, to do something that feels uncomfortable, or new, to us. Something that we are uncertain about, and being uncertain often causes us to feel less than safe, less than secure.

When we don’t want to take the leap of faith that intuition seems to be requiring, we begin to use logic to argue for our limitations.

The next time you “hear” your intuition nagging you…acknowledge that inner voice, and acknowledge your logical thoughts, and ask them how they can support you to move in the direction your intuition is leading.

Get quiet and ask yourself which thoughts and ideas are the result of Love, and which thoughts and ideas are the result of Fear.

This week when I took the time to really find out about working with this new coach, I found that the synchronicities were almost overwhelming. Sign after lovely sign confirming my intuition. And I recognized once again that my intuition is always in service of my soul’s purpose, always in the service of Love, always gentle, always for my highest good.

How is your intuition speaking to you this week?  I’d love to know.  Leave me a comment below and let’s talk about it. 🙂

Love & Magic,

Cindie

 

 

 

Posted in Coaching, Conscious Communication, Life Purpose, Personal Growth | 13 Comments

Snowed In (or Environment Trumps Intention – Part II)

cocoaheartThis past week we’ve been “snowed in”…by a half inch of snow.

Because that’s how we roll here in the deep south.

The roads and bridges were icy due to an unexpected cold snap, so schools and businesses closed up until the sun decided to come out and melt away the troublesome frozen layer. We just don’t always have what we need to survive and be safe and comfortable in sub-freezing temperatures. Heck, some of us don’t even own a heavy coat, let alone things like snow tires and ice scrapers.

So the snowdays began with my Handsome Sweetheart home, along with a few other loved ones who suddenly had no school or work.

Outside it was in the 20’s with frozen rain falling from the grey sky.

Inside there was fresh coffee, hot cocoa, a down comforter, my Handsome Sweetheart, and a queue full of time travel movies.

Pop quiz: How much writing did I get done during the 2-day Winter Wonderland Staycation?

Answer: None.

And I had a wonderful snugly time with my Handsome Sweetheart – I have no regrets about our impromptu snow days. I did however recognize that I proved a theory to myself – that theory being: “Environment trumps intention“.

And I’m not talking about the weather. (Although in this case it definitely played a part). I’m talking about my “work” environment, my “home” environment, my “life” environment. You see…Tuesdays are my intended “writing days”, and this past Tuesday my environment absolutely trumped that intention.

I was “distracted by something shiny”…namely hot cocoa, time travel movies, a down comforter, and my Handsome Sweetheart. Nearly impossible to resist that combination.

And, I enjoyed every single warm snugly minute of it.

A few weeks ago I spent several sessions with clients helping them determine their themes for the new year, and brainstorming with them to create some support systems and ideas to help them fulfill those themes.

JOYOne of my clients chose the theme of Joyful Service, because she has a desire to serve more people this year and she intends to do it from a place of joy, and not from a place of fear, guilt or obligation. She made herself a fantastic piece of art to hang in her office, it says “JOY”. She placed it there in her office to remind her of WHY she does what she does. It is a powerful addition to her “environment” that supports her in serving others with joy. Another thing I love about her artwork is that she took all of the pictures herself while on vacation – an entire alphabet made up of architectural details.  At first glance you might not notice that the details are spelling out the word “joy”…but look again, there it is. Another powerful reminder that we can find what we are looking for almost anywhere if we search for it with intention.

If we create environments and systems that support our intentions we have a greater chance of success – not to mention an easier more pleasant time of it. I promise that when you also build in accountability (via a supportive group of like-minded peeps, or by partnering with a coach or mentor) you will find yourself succeeding more and more.

And hey, if you wake up to an unexpected snow day or two – it’s okay. Give yourself a break, find the warm snugly place, and know for certain that when the sun comes back out you’ll be able to look back and find the lesson buried beneath the frozen layer.

Love & Magic,

Cindie

 

 

P.S. If you’d like some support in creating an intention, here is a 20 minute audio exercise called The Magic of Intention I created recently for the Raising Loveliness Retreat.

 

photo credits:
hot cocoa – amenic181- freedigitalphotos.net
“Joy” – Lori Pannell
Posted in General | 2 Comments

Three Wishes

Dandelion2

One of this year’s holiday gifts that I’m enjoying the most was this book: Our Q and A a Day: 3-Year Journal for 2 People, (ghost written by the wonderful Alexandra Franzen!)

Yes.  You read that correctly. It is a three year journal for two people. Now…before you click away, thinking OMG my partner would NEVER write in a journal with me…let me just say, it’s been pretty painless so far, in fact it’s been wonderful. There are prompts and questions that you both can answer in a few words, without too much struggle, without thinking too hard.

Questions like “What was the last meal you enjoyed together?“…okay that one was easy, it was the last meal we had.

Or this one – “When was the last time your partner made you laugh out loud?” – Ummm, 1 minute ago? LOL. See?, easy.

Until today. Today, shit got real. Today, the question asked “What are your top three wishes?” Hmmm. At first I announced that I wasn’t answering those. Too hard. Too much thinking. Too serious. Handsome Sweetheart was all for skipping too.

Really I just didn’t want to answer because it didn’t feel good. But, why? “Why is this so hard?“, I silently pondered. And then it hit me, it is because I don’t wish. I pretty much don’t wish for things, in the same way I don’t choose to “hope” for things, at least not for myself.

A teacher of mine once said, “Hope is the most poetic form of victimhood.” That idea made a powerful impression on me.

Now, believe me, I do not want anyone in the world to feel hopeless, because that is a very dark, scary, place – but often the thing that restores hope is the power that comes with realizing that we can affect change. That we DO have the power to choose, to create, to improve our life, our world. Often this is brought about by the experience of Love. Including self-love. And when hope is restored it can be quickly replaced with empowerment, conscious intention, and purposeful action.

Because “wishing” and “hoping” always put me in the place (energetically and emotionally speaking) of feeling powerless.

If all I can do is wish, or hope that something turns out the way I want it to, then I have no power to bring that thing into the world. I put myself in the place of being a bystander, just watching, waiting, hoping. In that place all I can do is live at effect, and not at cause.

So, although I can wish or hope for things for others, “I wish you a happy day”, and “I hope you begin to feel better quickly”, I don’t generally make wishes or sit around hoping for things for myself.

I like to make conscious intentions instead, I like to take purposeful action. I choose to live at cause.

Yes, there will always be things that I “wish” for, and I also like to brainstorm the best way to bring them into reality, to set myself up for success, to have my “wishes” come true.

My most recent mentor and teacher, Hiro Boga, just asked for a group of us to list our three wishes for the new year – for ourselves, for our beloveds, and for the world.

I struggled a bit with this, at least for my own personal wish. Eventually I answered the questions with these words,”My deepest desire for myself is to come into the full bloom of what is possible using my gifts to bring more Love & Magic into the world. For my beloveds, for the world, I desire more Peace, more Joy, more Love.”

And although I did eventually answer the questions in the journal I’m keeping with my Handsome Sweetheart, I also wrote down a 4th “wish”: “That I would become an even fuller expression of Love.”

Because the more we love the more power we have. The more we love the more healing we bring. The more we love the more miracles, the more magic…and the more wishes coming true.

I mean really – who wants to be limited to just three?

Love & Magic.

Cindie

 

Posted in General | 2 Comments