Do you have some things going on in your life right now that are hard for you to accept? If you said, “yes”, you’re in good company – and a very large company at that! I can imagine that most of us can say yes to that question. As I write this I’m enjoying a pain free day – after more than a week of enduring a migraine headache – I’ve had my share of migraines over the years, and they’re never something I find myself readily accepting.
Pain is not an easy thing to accept. But this week I found myself more and more readily accepting the pain, getting curious about it, wondering how it was serving me – and asking myself what the “trick” was to accepting (and releasing) this pain.
I’m reminded of the scene in Lawrence of Arabia where Peter O’Toole puts out a flame with his fingers. When another man tries it he quickly exclaims that it hurts (!) and asks “What’s the trick?” “The trick,” Lawrence answers, “is not minding that it hurts.”
There is a lot of truth in that statement. When we can step into that place of “not minding”, that place of acceptance, that’s the place where we begin to see big shifts and serious magic. Why? Because that’s when we step into non-resistance.
In the practice of conscious creation we hear a lot about non-resistance. One of my favorite ideas to remember when I’m resisting anything is that “non-resistance is imperative to magic”. We just can’t create much when we are resisting something, except more of what we are resisting.
And although we may be quick to think that “resisting” is when we say “No” to something – such as the current political upheaval creating teeming crowds of “resistors” that are “resisting” or “saying no” to the current administration’s policies and actions – like Princess Leia leading her army, “The Resistance” to stand against (say “no”) to Darth Vader and his storm-troopers – when we resist this way (by saying “no”) we could label it “aversion” or “opposition”. This is usually what one thinks of when considering resistance.
However, there is also another form of resistance that actually seems more like saying “yes” – this is known as “Attachment”. In the same way that aversion is characterized by an inner energy of “saying no” – “NO NO NO, I don’t want this!”, Attachment is characterized by “saying yes” – or maybe more like “PLEEEEASE I’ve just gotta have this this this!” Attachment to specific outcomes often has the essence of begging and pleading in it – a very graspy type of energy.
Both positions, “NO NO NO!” and “PLEASE YES THIS PULEEEEZZZ!” are both forms of resistance. In both instances we are resisting “what is”. Resistance can be felt in the body. If you are wondering whether you are attached to a specific outcome just take a moment to scan your physical body for a sense of stress, or holding, or tension as you consider the circumstance.
When we are resisting what is, we are usually in the process of creating more of it.
The answer to this conundrum is acceptance. Acceptance leads to allowing.
By accepting what is we aren’t saying that we like it, love it, or want it to stay this way. We are just recognizing that “it is what it is” and realizing our own power in the situation.
We can go a bit further by adopting the idea that we actually created it this way for some reason that benefits us on some level. In some way, this thing is serving us. I like to get curious and ask myself, “Hmmmm how is this serving me? What am I loving about this situation?”
Once we get to this point of acceptance we can move into the place where we can choose something different – without striving, without aversion to what is, without attachment to specific outcomes, without resistance.
Non-resistance is imperative to magic. Acceptance is how we let the magic begin.
Love & Magic,