Over at the Love & Magic Salon there has been a discussion about authenticity, and how to navigate social expectations that might be in opposition to what we feel is our own Truth.
I understand, it can be really hard to “be yourself”.
And of course, we have to find our self first.
In the process of finding and becoming ourselves we often run into a few brick walls and barbed wire fences – metaphorically of course. (If you are running into literal brick walls or barbed wire then your problem is most likely something other than your blossoming authenticity.) *wink*
We grow up to a veritable chorus of voices chiming in all around us to make sure we know who we should become. “You are such a great little painter, you should be an artist,” or “You are really smart, you should become a lawyer”.
“You are going to make such a wonderful [fill in blank].”
We hear these encouragements over and over. And the people who say them to us (parents, teachers, relatives, neighbors, etc.) generally want the very best for us.
Somewhere along the line we also get impressed with what we should not do or be. Don’t be a brat. Don’t tell lies. Don’t get into trouble. Don’t do this. Don’t do that.
Don’t dye your hair green and please do NOT get a tattoo. sigh.
From day 1 we are literally encouraged and discouraged repeatedly towards one group of shoulds and away from a long list of should-nots. All with the very best intention for our highest good. Except when it isn’t.
And then…somewhere along the line we may realize that what everyone else wants and what everyone else thinks might not be exactly what is best for us. And…if we move an inch in one direction or the other there is a very real possibility of disappointing someone.
Oy. None of us want to be a disappointment.
On a larger scale this plays out in society too…we don’t want our community to “look” at us a certain way, or “see us in a bad light” or have the wrong opinion of us.
Here’s the thing, Lovebirds…you can’t please everyone all the time, anyway.
And you cannot fulfill your purpose here in the biggest, fullest, brightest way if you aren’t true to yourself.
Understand that as you become the truest version of yourself, your light will shine brighter and brighter. And bright lights are going to scare some people away.
And that same bright light will draw others to you.
And some of the people who back away from you will get curious tomorrow and want to come back and take a peek. They’ll remember the deeper things about you, the things they love, the things they trust, the parts of you they feel a kinship with.
And some of them will reach out to you again.
The qualities that will be magnified by your choice to be authentic will be the very same qualities that you need to navigate your way.
The loss of light and power we agree to when we decide to hide who we are is so much greater than the societal approval we lose when we allow our inner truth to shine forth.
There are no missing pieces in the Universe, and no extra pieces either.
And it isn’t your job or responsibility to convince anyone else of what is right for you.
You have a purpose here. And that purpose requires you to be authentic…to be exactly, precisely, who you are with no hiding, no faking it, no masks.
Because when you hide, when you fake it, when you wear a mask – you dim your light.
The world needs you to be shining as brightly as possible right now.
So shine bright.
I know you can.
Love & Magic,